But I’m Supposed to be a Teacher

I had a premonition I was going to be sick this week. Everyone around me has been getting sick, kids at school, my mIL, and nephew. So today while driving to work I was thinking to myself "If I think sick, I'm going to get sick. So I need to think positive. I can't get sick on race week!" Well first kid to get off the bus is pale, quiet, won't eat his breakfast when we get into class, and I can feel him burning up through his t-shirt. So I call his momma and while she's on her way, he falls asleep in the library area for like an hour. Poor little guy. So I'm thinking "Oh crap! Can't get sick, it's race week!" But turns out I get sick in a way I did not expect. One of our little girls has to be catheterized and today was the first time the nurse came in to do it. The nurse explains to me that someone has to be in the bathroom with her when she does it. So I go in there thinking nothing of it. Well we get her up on the changing table and I'm having to hold her legs open and the nurse is sitting there saying "I don't see the urethral opening?! See look! Here is the vaginal opening, here is the clitoris. It should be around here somewhere." All while she's moving this tube around there in that area. So I start to feel really hot and lightheaded. I'm thinking "Okay I'm fine, it will be over soon." Then the nurse pulls out her cell phone to call her boss to tell her "I can't find the urethral opening!" And by now I just knew if I didn't sit down I was going to faint. So I open the bathroom door into the classroom and one of the other teachers Carol is like "Sit down!" So I sit on the little kid couch. And then Carol tells me "No, you need to lay down!" So I'm laying on the carpet with all these little three and four year olds staring at me wondering what their teacher is doing lying on the ground. I was pretty embarrassed. I mean the little girl who is getting catheterized was completely fine and I'm the one hyperventilating and almost fainting. At one point I thought of being a physical therapist for kids with disabilities but then reality hit that I can't stomach anything hospital related. That's why I wanted to be a teacher! But I guess I still am going to have to deal with some blood and yucky stuff. I don't get it though, I spent 6 months in Ecuador wiping kids' butts with my bare hand and had no problem, but I can't even look at a little tube being put up a little hole! I don't know how I'm going to be a mom. I'm sure it's worse when it's your own kids you are watchingL